It feels like more than distance between us.

Many of us have probably experienced Rihanna’s dilemma in her song California King Bed. In the song, she laments the intangible distance that exists between her and her lover despite them being physically close. Sometimes, maybe even inseparable.

Don’t we all have a similar dose of her dilemma? Individuals who we constantly interact and live with yet who seem like live ten thousand miles apart. Woe to non-physical distance for coming between us and the people we desire to be close with!

And so can we conclude that distance, especially the non-physical kind, often leads up to nothing more than mere heartbreak?

I’ve actually pondered on such thought a few years back because of two things: 1) our Philosophy of the Human Person class had a similar topic (de-distancing) and 2) I was contemplating on how I dealt with people I was crushing on. Quite the irony I must say.

I believe that there exists an appropriate distance, both physical and non-physical, for everyone and everything. Thus, we have different appropriate distances for different people. Despite a fervent desire to be close with everyone, we will only be close to those who we’re meant to be close with.

Certainly, these appropriate distances would not immediately reveal themselves. There will be times when the lyrics and emotions of Rihanna’s song seem to come alive. We will question and mourn over the distances that seem to plague our relationships. But at the end of it all, we will eventually deal with others at the distance appropriate with our relationship with them. Thus, the best things we could probably do are to trust and respect that distance happens for a reason and that the appropriate distance will eventually reveal itself.

Should I distance myself from you?

Thus, instead of trying to be close with everyone, it will probable be more suitable if we desire to establish the appropriate distance we have for each of the individuals we meet. Rest assured that all of us have our own share of people meant to be distant from us and of course, those meant to be cheek to cheek with us for the rest of our lives.