One of the things I learned being a graduate of a Catholic university is dwelling on a passage during reflection. They say that you don't really need to read a lot to understand what God wants you for that day. You just have to dwell on a passage that strikes you. And strikes you oh so deep.
Today at mass, it didn't occur during the homily. It occurred during the final blessing at such a common adage. Well, to cut a long story short, it was the simple two word combination of "useless worrying."
Worrying is my cup of tea. My friend Andrew even described me as an eternal worrywart for my yearbook. Imagine that. Being described as someone who worries a lot can actually be worrysome. Haha. I guess this habit of mine of worrying a lot stems from the fact that I am a perfectionist of some sorts and that I don't want anything that would hinder me from achieving perfection. But of course, I'm much blessed a crammer thus creating such a unique and most of the time, harrowing experience. It's difficult to be a worrysome perfectionist and a hustler crammer at the same time. And I've almost died tons of times because of such combination.
But then those two words today could be the beginning of a change of perspective. Trusting in God that whatever happens is meant to happen (And God has saved my behind a lot of times He knows that) With the recent earthquake in Haiti, I've become more fearful of my life. Yet knowing that God always gets His way and that I'd always learn something for myself from such things makes me less worrysome and more trusting in Him and hopefully in other people.
A thought to close this entry. I think the past few entries, it's all been about trust. Four years later, i think I still haven't learned to really trust people especially with what happened to me. But just as I said, today may be the start of those walls I built to tumble down just as Beyonce's Halo would go.
If ever there's something I need, it's to trust more intelligently.
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